A deeper way to transform how you live and lead - from the inside out
My work is different. I help Gen X leaders work at the root of their leadership identity - where early-life survival strategies, nervous-system wiring, and inherited stories still secretly shape how you show up today.
It’s evidence-based, trauma-aware, and designed to help you evolve who you are as a leader, not just what you do. It’s a forward-focused coaching approach, strengthened by therapeutic depth - including Brainspotting and arts-based experiential methods - so we can work safely at the level where patterns are formed, not just where they appear.
I bring skills and qualifications that go beyond typical executive coaching pathways, without turning our work into therapy or analysis for its own sake. Everything we do is anchored in insight, integration, and a return to the leadership of your True Self.
Gen X isn’t broken.
Many of us are simply still operating from patterns that once kept us safe.
This work helps you recognise those patterns, understand how your identity and nervous system shape your reactions, and begin leading from a more grounded, authentic version of yourself.
Why Gen X leaders are exhausted (and why none of this is your fault)
The patterns you carry weren’t created because something was wrong with you. They were intelligent responses to the environments you grew up in.
Many Gen X leaders were raised by Silent Generation or early Boomer parents — adults shaped by war, scarcity, emotional restriction, or the pressure to achieve and “hold it all together.” Talking about feelings was rare. Strength meant coping, not cracking.
Layer onto that:
- Latchkey independence.
- Early emotional responsibility.
- The divorce surge.
- Workplaces built on hierarchy, pressure, and chronic over-functioning.
Research on adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) shows that early stressors shape adult coping patterns. For many Gen X leaders, that now looks like:
- Extreme self-reliance.
- Emotional suppression.
- Over-responsibility.
- Perfectionism.
- Difficulty resting or receiving support.
- Feeling alone, even when surrounded by people.
Self-reliance built your success — and now it isolates you.
It makes it harder to trust, delegate, rest, express, or let yourself be fully known. Over time, it narrows your options, increases internal pressure, and quietly diminishes your sense of possibility.
These are not character flaws. They’re survival strategies doing exactly what they were designed to do.
Now it’s time to update the wiring — so you can lead from who you truly are, not who you had to be.
Who you are is how you lead
Sustainable leadership change doesn’t start with new behaviours. It starts with who you are, how your nervous system responds under pressure, and the story you’ve been living from.
- Who you are beneath the roles and expectations.
- How your nervous system reacts when life and leadership apply pressure.
- The story about yourself and the world that’s been running quietly in the background.
If early experiences shaped your identity and coping patterns, then evolving those patterns is how we grow self-leadership, creativity, emotional availability, and the sense of internal safety required for healthy relationships at home and at work.
Instead of fighting the part of you that coped so brilliantly, we honour it — and help you stop running on yesterday’s wiring.
This is where deep, lasting change happens: not as a performance, but as a shift in who you are being.
How I am different to traditional executive coaches
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My approach: Evolves leadership identity because sustainable change begins within, not just in what you do.
Traditional approach: Focus on surface level behaviour and skills only.
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My approach: Reveals the unconscious drivers shaping decisions and reactions so you lead by choice instead of conditioning.
Traditional approach: Targets symptoms – productivity, KPI’s, outputs.
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My approach: 80% of the information your brain receives comes from the body. I am certified to safely integrate Brain Spotting that activates the sub cortical regions of your brain, making transformation possible, and sustainable.
Traditional approach: Relies on talk and logic alone.
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My approach: Builds internal psychological safety and nervous system capacity so you respond with calm authority rather than reacting from survival.
Traditional approach: Teaches you to push through stress.
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My approach: Align what you think, feel, and express so leadership is coherent and trustworthy.
Traditional approach: Aims for clarity, a purely cognitive goal.
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My approach: Translate awareness into embodied action through neurobiological rewiring and practice — because insight without integration doesn’t transform behaviour.
Traditional approach: Stops at awareness and insight.
Every Gen X leader reaches a moment where your old story no longer works — and the pressure to change has been building beneath the surface. This is not a crisis. It’s a call.
A call toward:
- a more truthful identity,
- a more grounded nervous system,
- a more authentic way of living and leading,
- a life that feels like yours again.
I use biography and the Hero’s Journey not to dramatise your experience but to give it coherence and meaning.
There’s a chapter where “normal” ends — when the story you’ve been living by stops fitting, and the cost of keeping things the same becomes too high to ignore.
This is the path of initiation: you turn toward the patterns you once had to outrun — the self-reliance, the armour, the over-responsibility — with curiosity instead of judgement.
Together, we explore how those patterns were formed, how they still shape your leadership and relationships, and what becomes possible when you’re no longer driven by them.
The journey is not about escaping your life. It’s about returning to it with more truth, steadiness, self-leadership, and purpose.
This isn’t about becoming someone else. It’s about becoming the person you were always meant to be — and letting your leadership flow from there.
Your leadership and life as a Hero’s Journey
This isn’t a linear three-step formula. It’s a rhythm we move through again and again as your leadership identity evolves.
You begin to recognise:
- The patterns driving your reactions.
- How you’re creating many of your own stress responses.
- The masks and armour you’ve worn to stay safe.
- How earlier experiences echo through your life and leadership today.
The Energy Leadership Index (ELI) reveals how the way you see yourself, others, and the world shapes your reactions — including patterns that create unnecessary stress or friction.
Other frameworks — including Enneagram-informed inquiry and biographical mapping — help make your internal landscape visible, without needing to relive the past.
We work directly with the brain and nervous system to soften old reactions and open up new choices:
- Brainspotting.
- Nervous-system practices.
- Arts-Based Experiential Learning (creative, image-based exploration that bypasses overthinking and reveals deeper truth).
- Identity-based coaching conversations.
This is where “I know what I should do” begins to transform into “I can actually respond differently in the moment.”
With the right support, deepening self-awareness, and ongoing implementation and reflection:
- The new patterns become natural.
- Emotional steadiness increases.
- Boundaries strengthen.
- Self-trust grows.
- Inner and outer relationships shift.
- Clarity and creativity return.
- Leadership becomes embodied rather than performed.
Your self-leadership becomes more honest, congruent, and internally anchored — and the way you influence and inspire others becomes a natural expression of your True Self.
A rhythm we cycle through as you grow
This work is less about “fixing” you and more about creating the conditions for your real self to come back online.
- A confidential, non-judgemental space where it’s safe to let your guard down.
- Direct honesty delivered with care, never in a way that shames you or cuts you down.
- A blend of structure and responsiveness.
- Space to explore how you lead yourself — not just the role you play.
- Attention on your whole life, not just your work.
- Insight that becomes embodiment, not just awareness.
- A return of creativity, emotional range, humour, and a renewed sense of possibility.
- Less living on emergency power.
- More internal steadiness, even when life is loud.
- A stronger sense of identity and purpose.
- Deeper self-awareness that changes how you think, act, and relate.
- Healthier dynamics at home and at work.
- Leadership that feels like an expression of who you actually are.
